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An Affinity of Support: Open Water Swimming for Mental Health and Community

By Lisa Judson If anyone had told me two years ago that I’d be swimming in open water, all through the year, in temperatures that sometimes go down to the minus figures, I would, without doubt, have told them EXACTLY where to go! But here we are, two years on and guess what I’m doing, between two and four times a week on average?! The way it worked was that my therapist tried for more than two years to get me to try it. She explained how good it was for your central nervous system and how it would help to reset my brain. She even took me to the lake where I now swim around four times a week. I laughed and said, (this is the polite, publishable version by the way) “not a chance — but the oat milk decaf latte was ok — so I’d come down and join you for one of those.” About six months later I was standing at the edge of the lake, in a wetsuit, with her encouraging me to just step in for a moment. It has to be said that my ADHD brain is a little tinker for helping me into an “all or...
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Why Talking About Death Matters

By Lisa Judson My mum had eight siblings. Her youngest sister, Jean, or as I called her, my Diddy Aunty (for context, she was under five feet tall and I was taller than her by the time I was eight), was like a second mum to me. When I lost my mum in 2009, it was my Diddy Aunty who quietly stepped in and filled that space. So when she was tragically killed seven years ago, the impact was enormous. Nobody expected it. There was no preparation. No warning. Just shock. And grief. Somehow, in the middle of all that, it fell to me to care for her husband and organise her funeral. When I asked him what he would like for her service, he simply stared at me and said, “I’ve no idea, ducky. We never talked about it.” Tentatively, I replied, “Well actually, I know. She told me.” He looked at me, equal parts indignant and relieved, and asked, “Why did she do that?” The answer was simple. “Because I asked her.” You see, by that point I had already played this very sad game several tim...

The Magic Is Inside Us: An Open Letter to My Best Friend on Our 15 Year Anniversary

The magic is inside you ... there ain’t no crystal ball! — Dolly Parton Wednesday May 6, 2026 Dear Fran. Today is our fifteenth anniversary as friends. Fifteen is a big number. Not as big as 5,479 which is the number of days we’ve been friends but big nonetheless. Remember in the beginning when I insisted on marking each succeeding month of our friendship? I’ve always had a tendency to overdo things. To be too much. You’ve done well to put up with me! I couldn’t have known we’d still be friends all these years later but from the moment we met your presence in my life was something I wanted to celebrate. That hasn’t changed, though I don’t say it so often. Fifteenth anniversaries are traditionally marked with crystal. Apparently it symbolises the “clear, sparkling, and transparent nature” of the relationship as well as its beauty, strength, and durability whilst simultaneously reminding both parties “to handle their lasting bond with care, as crystal is fragile.” So mu...

Q&A with Aimee Wilson, Project Lead of Gracie’s Way, for Dying Matters Awareness Week

TW: Mention of suicide, abuse, and rape

Our Top Posts of the Month (April 2026)

Check out our top blog posts for the past month. Posts are listed by the number of page views they attracted during the month, most popular first.

A Quiet Seat at the Table: Eight Ways to Help Your Introverted Friend Enjoy Your Event

Introverts, in contrast, may have strong social skills and enjoy parties and business meetings, but after a while wish they were home in their pajamas. — Susan Cain A few months ago I shared a post inspired by Fran’s approach to things she’s unsure or anxious about. It wasn’t a theoretical exercise for me. As I mentioned in the article I’d been invited to a wedding in April. “I’m already anxious about it,” I confessed. “But it means a lot that my friends want me there and I’m looking forward to celebrating their day with them.” Social anxiety isn’t fun. And it’s not only weddings. I’ve felt anxious attending funerals, parties, mental health events (I’m aware of the irony), even get togethers with friends. If the plans involve more than two other people it’s a safe bet I’ll be uneasy about it beforehand. I called it social anxiety but I can be more specific. It’s the conversations that are the issue. I’m generally okay talking one-to-one. But as soon as there’s a third perso...

Behind the Mic: Our Top 5 Podcasts and Speaking Engagements

The one thing you have that nobody else has is you. Your voice, your mind, your story, your vision. — Neil Gaiman, Make Good Art My friend Sophie May was recently interviewed by Tasha Hargreaves for the Bold Brave Business Owners podcast. You can listen to the episode (“It’s more about progression than perfection”) here on Spotify . Sophie and I are relatively new friends, having met online a few months ago. I was fascinated to learn more of her personal journey and the digital marketing business she began earlier this year. Her hopes, vision, and passion came across powerfully and will undoubtedly be of interest and help to many. I look forward to showcasing more of her story and experience here at Gum on My Shoe in the near future. It occurred to me that many of our friends and readers haven’t met me or Fran in person and may never have heard our voices. I thought it would be fun to share a few of our favourite speaking engagements. There’s a full list on our portfolio page...