Gum on My Shoe

You’ll never walk alone. — Liverpool Football Club motto This post was originally published for International Men’s Day 2025 at I’m NOT Disordered . I’m grateful to Aimee [Wilson] for the opportunity to write this guest piece for International Men’s Day (IMD). For those who don’t know, IMD is marked every year on November 19. The purpose is to acknowledge the positive value men bring to the world, their families and communities, and raise awareness of men’s health, mental health, and well-being. The theme for 2025 is “Celebrating Men and Boys.” With my best friend Fran Houston I blog at Gum on My Shoe on mental health and supportive friendships. I’ve written for IMD in the past but I was unsure how to approach this year’s theme until Aimee suggested I think back to when I was a boy. What did I imagine my life would be like when I grew up? What did I want to be? It was a great idea and you can read the piece it inspired on my blog here . Writing it was both interesting and c...

Fran and I write a lot about our lives and friendship, so we thought it would be fun to see how much our readers know about us! There are no prizes but we’d love to hear how you got on! Answers are at the bottom of this post. No cheating! THE QUESTIONS Merry Meetings Q1. When and how did we first meet? Q2. We’ve met once in person. In what year? Bonus point for where. Q3. In which city did Fran wave to Marty on webcam from the deck of the cruise ship Eurodam ? Time and Place Q4. What is the time difference in hours between Porland, Maine and Newcastle, Tyne and Wear? Q5. How far apart are we when we’re each in our respective homes? 1,000 miles, 2,000 miles, or 3,000 miles. Q6. Where was Martin born: London, Norwich, or Liverpool? Wellness and Illness Q7. Which of the following is not a type of bipolar disorder? Bipolar 1, Bipolar 2, Bipolar 3, Cyclothymic Disorder. Q8. What is the term for an inability to define or express one’s emotions? Who and What...

Welcome to Gum on My Shoe, a platform dedicated to fostering understanding, support, and advocacy for mental health, particularly in relation to bipolar disorder. Today, we have the privilege of delving into the story behind this impactful blog and its companion book, High Tide, Low Tide: The Caring Friend’s Guide to Bipolar Disorder . Join us as we chat with Martin Baker, one of the blog’s co-founders, about the power of friendship, resilience, and breaking down barriers in mental health advocacy. 1. Can you share the inspiration behind starting Gum on My Shoe and writing High Tide, Low Tide ? The idea for our book High Tide, Low Tide came when I mentioned to Fran that I felt inspired to do something creative. I wasn’t thinking about mental health as such, more like maybe some short stories, or focusing on my photography. Fran had other ideas! “I know what you could do,” she said. “You could write a book about being friends with someone who lives with mental illness!” I reali...

May you be proud of the work you do, the person you are, and the difference you make. (Unknown) I’m a great believer in celebrating success , no matter how great or small it might seem in the grand scale of things. It’s healthy to take pride in our achievements, and to acknowledge those of our friends and loved ones. Those four little words — I’m proud of you — can mean so much. With that in mind, I’d like to share three blog posts I’m especially proud of writing. An Open Letter to My Bipolar Best Friend Read the full post here . This is the first piece that came to mind when I started thinking about which posts I’m most proud of. I love the open letter format, and have written several, including one to Fran to mark ten years of friendship , and letters to my late mother and father . This first one to Fran, though, is special. Written in May 2016, it captures the essence of what we’re about, our journey as friends, and my personal journey in the mental health arema...

Men for the sake of getting a living forget to live. (Margaret Fuller) A few weeks ago I was listening in to the regular “all colleague call” at work. I was caught totally by surprise when I heard my name called out, to recognise my having completed thirty years of service. The anniversary had completely escaped my notice. In that time, I’ve actually worked for at least five employers, as the agency or company that employed me was outsourced, renamed, bought out, or merged with another entity. For reasons I’ve never quite understood, this all counts as continuous service. Many of my colleagues underwent the same transformation, depending on when they boarded the carousel. There aren’t too many, though, who’ve worked here as long as I have. Almost everyone I started out with has long since retired, left, or otherwise moved on. I follow a few of them on social media, but most were colleagues rather than friends and I’ve not sought to keep the connections alive. In passing, I c...

By his blogging bestie, Aimee Wilson As soon as Martin told me he was writing a blog post about what a person can “bring” to a friendship; I thought it might be nice to talk about all the reasons why he’s one of my best-friends, my inspiration in so many ways, and genuinely the kindest and most supportive man I know! Immediately after I first recognised that I was making real progress in my mental health recovery, I felt the need to think about who and what had helped or made it happen. This meant that I’ve grown to really believe in the importance and significance of showing gratitude and appreciation for the people and the things that have really shaped your life in so many different ways. It is that which has encouraged me to tell you all that Martin is actually as lovely in real life as he is on Gum On My Shoe! The part of my life he is probably the most important for is in everything to do with blogging — and I don’t want that to sound superficial or insignificant — my...

Writing prompt: Tell the story of something that happened to you, but write it from a different perspective, or as fiction rather than fact. It was our first visit to the Green Festival. In past years I’d learned about it after the event, or we were doing something else, or ... well, anyway, this year we went along: my wife Pamela, son Michael and step-daughter Emma. When we arrived there seemed to be plenty going on. Lots of stalls and tents, noise and people. Our first priority, though, was food: somewhere to sit and eat the picnic we’d brought with us. We found a suitable spot close by a huge felled tree that was providing children with a makeshift and ecologically sound climbing frame. We attacked our picnic with good-natured greed to the accompaniment of the loud, live, 70s music emanating from a marquee somewhere close behind us. My hunger pangs assuaged, I sat back to take in the surroundings and indulge in a little people-watching. Perhaps from a desire on the part o...

My pronouns are he/him/his . Observed each year on November 19, International Men’s Day (IMD) celebrates the positive value men bring to the world, their families and communities, highlighting positive role models and raising awareness of men’s well-being, including mental health. I shared some general thoughts on connection and conversation for IMD last year. This time, I thought I’d go a little deeper, and explore what being a man means to me. That should be pretty easy, right? I’ve had sixty-one years to figure out what being a guy is all about. Oddly enough, it’s proven a lot harder than I imagined. It’s not that I’ve ever felt misgendered, or unhappy at being thought of as male. I’ve worn my gender identity all my life, albeit without thinking much about it. I was a boy. I am a man. But what does that mean ? Let’s start with International Men’s Day itself. Do I feel it’s for and about me? Does it resonate? It does, yes. Last year was the first time I’d engaged with IMD, bu...