Gum on My Shoe

Founded in 2014, National Grief Awareness Day , also known as National Bereavement Day, is marked each August 30. Its purpose is to raise awareness of how grief affects people in different ways, to encourage conversations about loss and bereavement, and to share information and resources. Related campaigns include Dying Matters Awareness Week in May and National Grief Awareness Week in December. We’ve marked several of these with such posts as Why Talking About Death Matters by celebrant Lisa Judson, a Q&A with Aimee Wilson, Project Lead of the pet bereavement project Gracie’s Way , and There’s No Wrong Way to Grieve: Thoughts on Loss and Mourning . As I was researching a topic for this post I came across two quotations. The first is by Swiss-American psychiatrist and author Elisabeth Kubler-Ross. The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not “get over” the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the...

By Lisa Judson My mum had eight siblings. Her youngest sister, Jean, or as I called her, my Diddy Aunty (for context, she was under five feet tall and I was taller than her by the time I was eight), was like a second mum to me. When I lost my mum in 2009, it was my Diddy Aunty who quietly stepped in and filled that space. So when she was tragically killed seven years ago, the impact was enormous. Nobody expected it. There was no preparation. No warning. Just shock. And grief. Somehow, in the middle of all that, it fell to me to care for her husband and organise her funeral. When I asked him what he would like for her service, he simply stared at me and said, “I’ve no idea, ducky. We never talked about it.” Tentatively, I replied, “Well actually, I know. She told me.” He looked at me, equal parts indignant and relieved, and asked, “Why did she do that?” The answer was simple. “Because I asked her.” You see, by that point I had already played this very sad game several tim...

TW: Mention of suicide, abuse, and rape

By Aimee Wilson What we once enjoyed and deeply loved we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes a part of us. — Helen Keller Hello! I’m Aimee, fellow mental health blogger (at www.imnotdisordered.co.uk ). My guest post today, however, is to mark the official launch of my huge new project, Gracie’s Way. I decided to use this guest post to write about all the things — big, small, technical, emotional, and practical; EVERYTHING! — I’ve needed in the creation journey. Experience and Inspiration Of course, the most obviously helpful thing to have in creating this project, was the horrible experience of losing my youngest bunny, Gracie. For around two days I had noticed wet stools (a symptom of Gut Stasis which my first rabbit died from) but because I had two rabbits (Luna being the name of the eldest) I couldn’t tell who was doing it. So, it wasn’t until October 31 that Gracie finally started showing all the other symptoms of Gut Stasis. She stopped eating, she sta...

Don’t tell people they can do the impossible. Tell people that they can do the possible that they think is impossible. — Denis Waitley This post was inspired by something I saw recently on social media concerning illness and expectations. The author recalled someone they knew years ago who’d completed a major endurance feat despite living with significant physical disabilities. Their achievement had reinforced in the author the commonplace expectation that “anything is possible” if you’re sufficiently motivated, no matter your situation or circumstances. They were ill-prepared for the reality. Life is often far more restrictive and restricted, especially for someone with energy-limiting conditions. They highlighted the lack of help and guidance for people with chronic health conditions who grieve the life they never get to live. The post had been shared by Facebook accounts focusing on conditions including chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS/ME) and fibromyalgia, attracting a lot ...

I cherish the boat we built together. It keeps me afloat when the waves of grief come rolling in. — Dances with Dan: Embracing Grief National Grief Awareness Week is dedicated to raising awareness about grief, offering support to those grieving, and building understanding around the grieving process. It recognises that grief is a natural response to loss and works to break down the stigma that often surrounds what is a deeply personal journey. It’s an opportunity to foster compassion, encourage open conversations, and create a more supportive environment for everyone affected by loss. The theme for Grief Awareness Week 2024 (December 2 – 8) is Shine a Light. The light I’d like to shine is that there’s no wrong way to grieve. It’s important to remember this, because it’s easy to fall into thinking we’re doing it wrong, too much, or not enough. Part of the problem is we’re taught there are right ways of grieving, without acknowledging that these may not work for everyone....

Loneliness is the feeling we experience when there is a mismatch between the social connections we have and those that we need or want. — Mark Rowland, CEO, Mental Health Foundation I’m grateful to my friend and fellow mental health blogger Aimee Wilson of I’m NOT Disordered for inspiring this post. The theme for this year’s Mental Health Awareness Week is loneliness. I can’t always draw on my lived experience when discussing mental health, but loneliness is something I know first-hand. I think that’s true of everyone. We’ve all been lonely at some time in our lives, and yet each of us experiences it in our own way. Perspectives of Loneliness Keen to elicit some different perspectives, I posted a request on social media for contributions on the theme of “what does loneliness mean to me?” I received some brilliant and heart-moving responses. “Loneliness is feeling like no one in the world could possibly understand you or what you’ve been through.” (Aimee) “Loneline...