Gum on My Shoe

Check out our top posts for the past month. Posts are listed by number of page views they attracted during the month, most popular first. Our Top Posts of the Month (January 2020) Bipolar and Saying No: Why I Can’t Always Do Fun Things with You Please Invite Me Out With You Love and Friendship: What Valentine’s Day Means to Me Would You Rather? Time to Talk Day 2020 #TimeToTalk: Thank You for Not Assuming I’m OK 14 Great Posts from Last Year That Will Change Your Now How to Write the Best Acknowledgement Page for Your Book It’s Okay If You Don’t Know How to Help Me Every Day Essentials for the Successful Blogger Our most visited pages were: Contact Us Resources About Us Our books Testimonials News and Appearances  

Came to you with a broken faith. Gave me more than a hand to hold. Caught before I hit the ground. Tell me I’m safe, you’ve got me now. (Jess Glynne, “Take Me Home”) Listening to Spotify recently I came across Take Me Home by Jess Glynne. In the artist’s words , “This is a song about the need to have someone who cares when you are at your most vulnerable.” I’m fortunate to have people like that in my life. People who are there for me and allow me to be there for them. You might imagine this kind of support means always knowing how to help, but that’s not the case at all. It feels good when you’re able to offer what someone needs; be that words of comfort or advice, or practical assistance. But there are times when you will have neither the words nor any clear idea of what to do. It is important to recognise and accept when this happens without feeling a failure to yourself or the person you want to help. As I’ve written elsewhere : Don’t feel paralysed or useless if you can’t ...

By Amy Cullis Ever since I started to become mentally ill, I have noticed a distinct drop in the amount of times I have been invited out by friends. I have even lost friends because of the effects of my illnesses. Many of the times I’ve been invited out, I know I’ve cancelled and this probably leads to someone wondering if I really do want to meet up with them. The truth is, I do though. I really truly do. I have Generalised Anxiety Disorder, Depression, Borderline Personality Disorder, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. It’s hard to believe that one person can accumulate so many mental illnesses, but it is possible. Each of these illnesses affect my functioning in one way or another, and pretty much all of them can affect my ability to get out of the house and meet up with people. My Anxiety and OCD make me worry about humiliating myself in public. I fear losing control of my bladder through not being able to get to a toilet in time. I have to co...

Many moons ago I marked Valentine’s Day each year by exchanging friendship cards with one of my dearest friends, PJ. (Pamela Jane. She was Jane to her family, PJ or Pam to friends.) This was long before social media and instant messaging (yes really!) and we wrote letters to each other all the time, often by return of post. For years we shared the ups and downs of our lives that way; our hopes and fears and dreams for the future. I’m not sure we ever called each other best friends but that’s what we were. Over time we drifted apart, as friends do sometimes. Our letters became less frequent. At some point we stopped sending each other Valentine’s cards. And then she got sick. Many years later I included our story in the first book I wrote with Fran. I knew little of the disease [multiple sclerosis], and never took the trouble to ask or research what it meant. My friend spoke pragmatically of the impact it would have on her life, imagining and planning for a gradual physical deteri...

This year’s Time to Talk Day is Thursday February 6, 2020. I wrote recently about feeling flat which is something that happens from time to time. Many of my friends live with significant mental health issues and it would be easy for them to dismiss my accounts of when I am feeling low. It is a testament to them and the nature of our friendships that I feel safe sharing how I feel no matter how mild that might be compared to what are often dealing with. My friend Aimee Wilson blogs at I’m NOT Disordered about her lived experience with serious mental health issues including borderline personality disorder, self-harm, and suicidality. My moods, issues, and problems are mostly trivial in comparison to hers but Aimee has always treated me with respect and empathy. The following exchange is a great example of this. It meant a lot that she did not assume I was okay but checked to be sure. Martin: Hiya. I’m making some notes towards answering the questions at the end of your tra...

Time to Talk Day 2020 is Thursday February 6, 2020. Time to Change, the UK’s largest mental health campaign challenging stigma and discrimination has chosen the party game “Would you rather?” as the focus of this year’s Time to Talk Day . Choose talk, change lives. Mental health problems affect one in four of us, yet too many people are made to feel isolated, ashamed and worthless because of this. Time to Talk Day encourages everyone to be more open about mental health – to talk, to listen, to change lives. We know that talking about mental health can feel awkward, but it doesn’t have to. This year, we’re using the popular game ‘Would you rather?’ to help break the ice and get the conversation flowing. I have a confession to make. I’d never heard of, let alone played, this “popular game” until I started writing this article. Maybe I don’t get invited to the right kind of parties! To save you the trouble and embarrassment of googling it (as I had to!) the game is played by aski...

Check out our top posts for the past month. Posts are listed by number of page views they attracted during the month, most popular first. Every Day Essentials for the Successful Blogger 14 Great Posts from Last Year That Will Change Your Now How I Unplugged the Christmas Machine and Created Stable Holidays Bipolar and Saying No: Why I Can’t Always Do Fun Things with You Flatness and Disinclination Ten Things I Learned about Myself Last Week Our Top Posts of the Month (December 2019) Six Things I'd Quite Like to Do in 2019 - How Did I Get On? A Landscape of Labels: Mapping Illness and Wellness How to Write the Best Acknowledgement Page for Your Book Our most visited pages were: Contact Us Resources About Us Our books News and Appearances Testimonials