Gum on My Shoe

TW: Mention of rape and sexual abuse.

This blog post was inspired by a recent conversation with my friend and fellow mental health blogger Aimee Wilson. We’d been chatting for a while when I asked for clarification about something she’d mentioned a few minutes earlier. Aimee replied, pointing out that she’d told me already. I thanked her and we continued chatting. I didn’t think any more about it until she messaged me back a little later. Are you angry I told you I’d already said something you asked about? No! I can’t really imagine you doing something that would make me angry! (This is not a challenge to you lol) Hahaha kinda took that as a dare. I thought you might! That little exchange is typical of our friendship, with its mix of respect, care, and humour. On reflection, what I told Aimee was incorrect. I can imagine her upsetting me or making me angry. It’s happened before, just as there’ve been times when I’ve upset or angered her. What I meant was — and I know Aimee understood perfectly — on this occa...

Welcome to Gum on My Shoe, a platform dedicated to fostering understanding, support, and advocacy for mental health, particularly in relation to bipolar disorder. Today, we have the privilege of delving into the story behind this impactful blog and its companion book, High Tide, Low Tide: The Caring Friend’s Guide to Bipolar Disorder . Join us as we chat with Martin Baker, one of the blog’s co-founders, about the power of friendship, resilience, and breaking down barriers in mental health advocacy. 1. Can you share the inspiration behind starting Gum on My Shoe and writing High Tide, Low Tide ? The idea for our book High Tide, Low Tide came when I mentioned to Fran that I felt inspired to do something creative. I wasn’t thinking about mental health as such, more like maybe some short stories, or focusing on my photography. Fran had other ideas! “I know what you could do,” she said. “You could write a book about being friends with someone who lives with mental illness!” I reali...

What you want to hear from others is what you need to tell yourself. — Pia Savannah This post was inspired by a recent conversation with Fran. She told me about some issues she was having with a friend. She kept running things over in her mind and was finding it hard to find resolution or let things go. We’re similar in that way. We both need time to process things internally, especially if it involves connections with friends and loved ones. Fran said she was thinking of writing a letter to her friend; not to send, but to get things out of her head and onto paper. It reminded me of a situation I’d been in, years ago. I was having some difficulties at the time with a friend. The friendship was fundamentally sound, but I was frustrated about what was going on between us. Like Fran was doing, I found myself churning the same thoughts and feelings over and over without getting any clarity or being able to move past it. I don’t remember all the details, but I do recall, precisely...

Check out our top posts for the past month. Posts are listed by the number of page views they attracted during the month, most popular first. Shhhhhhh! A Friend’s Guide to Secrets It’s Not Enough / Never Enough The Box on the Shelf: A Strategy for Handling Difficult Issues and Situations Six Times I Felt Proud This Week I’m Proud of You: Four Words That Mean So Much It’s Not Just for Kids: Reading Together for Fun and Friendship MOVE YOU YOUR WAY: A Few Thoughts on Movement and Self-Care for Mental Health Awareness Week Thanks, I’m Cured! The Big Red Button and What (Not) to Say When Your Friends Need Help How to Use a Spreadsheet for Wellness and Self-Care I Hope We All Make It Our most visited pages were: Contact Us Resources Our books About Us News and Appearances Testimonials   Photo of the Laing Art Gallery, Newcastle upon Tyne, by Martin Baker.  

May you be proud of the work you do, the person you are, and the difference you make. (Unknown) I’m a great believer in celebrating success , no matter how great or small it might seem in the grand scale of things. It’s healthy to take pride in our achievements, and to acknowledge those of our friends and loved ones. Those four little words — I’m proud of you — can mean so much. With that in mind, I’d like to share three blog posts I’m especially proud of writing. An Open Letter to My Bipolar Best Friend Read the full post here . This is the first piece that came to mind when I started thinking about which posts I’m most proud of. I love the open letter format, and have written several, including one to Fran to mark ten years of friendship , and letters to my late mother and father . This first one to Fran, though, is special. Written in May 2016, it captures the essence of what we’re about, our journey as friends, and my personal journey in the mental health arema...

Laing Art Gallery, Newcastle upon Tyne, England Fran and I enjoy sharing our lives as much and as richly as possible. That’s not always easy, given that we live three thousand miles apart, but few things are out of scope if you approach them with a little creativity! We often meet on video calls while we’re out and about, either locally or when we’re on vacation. The sounds of traffic and bird song. The trees and flowers, houses and gardens. Public transport and passers-by. All these and more take on a fresh vitality when shared with a friend, especially one who lives on the other side of the world. In this post I‘d like to share visits we‘ve made to the keynote art galleries in our respective cities: Portland‘s Museum of Art, and the Laing Art Gallery in Newcastle upon Tyne. Robert Indiana's Seven outside Portland Museum of Art, Portland, Maine The Portland Museum of Art Earlier this year, Fran took me to visit the Portland Museum of Art . It wasn’t the first time we’ve...